Where the Wild Things Are

This is an adventure where the phrase 'we're not out of the woods yet' applies perfectly. Growing up in the suburbs of Connecticut, I wouldn't exactly call myself a City Slicker, but yesterday's experience made me realize I'm not exactly an outdoorsman either.

For a few months, I've wanted to make a short trip down south to hike through Royal National Park. Saturday turned out to be a 25 degree (warm) day, so I decided to hop the train for Wollongong way. The express train dropped me out at Waterfall, what would be a fitting stop for this journey. My first hike took me to a place called Uloda Falls, which I suppose was a scenic spot about 5k from Waterfall station. From here, I decided to swap out my Rainbow sandals for trusty adidas snakers, which have served me well since 2001. This turned out to be one of my few good moves of the day, since a new path was uphill and rocky enough to warrant worn-out running sneakers. After reaching the peak of a scenic location, I decided to turn back and head for the waterall. But, um, where did the path go?? Oh, there it is...no, wait, that's just a bunch of rocks. Uh oh.

Royal National Park:


















Just a few months back, an English backpacker got lost in the wilderness of the Blue Mountains, then he was miraculously rescued. Now, those thoughts crept into my head. Am I the next transplant to make headlines and do A Current Affair inteview about my ordeal in the woods? OK, maybe not that dire since I could still hear motorycles off in the distance. But where the hell was I? And am I stepping on a poisonous snake with every step? I was still getting mobile reception, which I suppose was a good sign, in case I needed to dial for 'directions.' Hi, Mr. Park Ranger...I'm lost...I see rocks, trees and more trees...where am I?

Then of course there's that moment of elation: I've found a path! Where it's going, I don't care. But after about 10 minutes, the path dissolves into more forest. Where'd it go? Is this another Blair Witch Project? When do I start yelling for someone??

OK, time to dig into my bag of outdoor tricks. What have I learned from Bear Grylls and Man v Wild? Has Crocodile Dundee taught me anything? Yes, as a matter of fact, they have. When you find a lake or stream, follow it back to civilization. And watch where the sun is setting, it will take you west (where my train was probably patiently waiting). I was starting to get pretty thirsty, and that's when I found Banana Hammock and his wife.

Mr. Banana Hammock was a proper Aussie bloke, in his Greg Norman-meets-Mick-Dundee hat. His leathery skin resembled a topless Iggy Pop. And yes, the revealing Speedo was a little distracting. But alas, other humans! I'm saved...sort of. They directed me along the stream, per Bear Grylls, back to me home base at Waterfall station. I even managed to snag a bottle of water from the couple, my guardian angels in the wilderness. The walk along, next to and through the stream lasted for another hour and half. Still walking around trees, still probably avoiding snakes, still acquiring whatever rash these plants have to offer. In these situations, one always has a random song in their head to keep them truly insane. Randomly as always, mine was 'Up, Up and Away' by the 5th Dimension. If only I had a balloon that could take me out of there.

Finally, FINALLY I came upon the closest thing that resembled a path and heard the sweet sounds of 21st century civilization. Trains, motorcycles and other transport weren't too far off, and they sounded so sweet. Of course I had stumbled back out at the exact spot I started my day: Waterfall train station. How do these things work out so well?? As for my next blogger plug, I downed two bottles of Powerade and bag of M&Ms as my 'lunch' while boarding the train back to Sydney.

There were a few casualties of this four hour tour, including one of my Rainbow sandals, big rip in my jeans and water bottle from Banana Hammock's wife.

Following my experience, I offer these tips if you decide to hike in the wilderness of New South Wales:

- Bring multiple bottles of water (duh)
- Bring sunblock (duh)
- Bring a map (duh duh)
- Don't listen to your Ipod before getting lost
- Don't hike alone(duuuuh)

Today, I've decided to sit in the comfort of my home and watch college fooball. USC is winning.

'I'm So Going to Visit While You're Down There..."

I heard this quite a bit upon leaving the US two years ago. Friends, family, acquaintences were all making plans to jump on a flight to Sydney and enjoy a free place to stay. Even heard it when I was well-established here. Well, two years and a recession later, the visitors are in short supply. I know, I know....heard all the excuses so far: I'm waiting for the economy to get better, can't get work off, I'm drying my hair, it's baseball playoff season.

Well, those of you saving up to get married, this is a great place to get hitched. Anyone with babies? What's a better place to wake up at 4am?! As for that little financial difficulty stateside, well, your dollar goes really far here! On the US dollar, you could live like a king on kebabs and meat pies all week. Plus, flights within the country are pretty cheap, so you can be chilling Harbourside one day and sitting in a hammock with hippies in Byron the next, all for about $60.

I was fortunate enough to have a few friends this summer/winter, including a repeat visitor, someone who enjoys tropical North Queensland and both strawberries and fields. Then just heard that mom and Aunt Eileen are coming for a few weeks in November. That's the spirit!

But for all you Yanks waiting for the special moment when Qantas offers $250 return flights to Sydney, just know that your fellow adventurer Kev won't be down here forever. And then you'll be left to visiting Sydney without knowing the right kind of beer to drink, how to avoid getting hit by the buses and the easiest way to calculate the time difference.

In my first ever blogger plug, check out the great fares at http://www.vaustralia.com.au/. I heard this airline rules, hot meals and flight attendants.

9:07 is Now 10:07

Labor Day long weekend was also bday weekend. These are the little things that make four days pretty damn cool.

Friday: had birthday drinks with friends till I started to hiccup. I'm ok with my new age, an athlete's still in his prime, it's technically considered young and if in a band, I'd be entering my better, more mature phase. After Beauchamp, took the bus home while having my 1am dinner, a Reece's Peanut Butter Cup and Red Bull. No, I am not too old for this lifestyle.

Saturday: chatted with this cool girl Trinh for awhile, then got Turkish Delight and watched finish of Semi Pro and fave concert movie, Monterey Pop. Pretty much the script of how I wanted to spend a rainy/windy bday. At some point after going to sleep, time then went forward for daylight savings. It's like the Santa Claus of time came along and gave us an extra hour of sunlight. Leaving work in daylight hours is extremely underrated, and I will enjoy that for the next six months.

Grand Final Sunday: started as college football Saturday. Buckeyes won. Traded some good texts and made my way to the famous Golden Sheaf in Double Bay. Got Double Bay mixed up with Rose Bay and walked 30 min out of the way. While doing so, found $25 in the street. Somebody's getting both a train AND bus ticket this week. After pulling away from friends, walked back home and consumed more Turkish Delight. That place is like crack.

Monday: for the first time in forever, enjoyed a full football Sunday today, watched with fellow Yank, Tim. Giants won and Al Michaels is still announcing, both positive. More chatting after, followed by walking in the rain. Borders closed early, but just allowed me to come home and watch the season finale of Entourage. Did I not call that E was putting all his eggs in the Sloan basket?? Ari's entrance to the agency was classic.

And what's better than a long weekend is a short following week. And what's even better, baseball playoffs start this week, with an one-gamer tomorrow. Honestly, I don't ask for much.